6. PRIVATE CITIZEN DANILO LIHAYLIHAY FILES PLUNDER RAPS AGAINST GMA FOR "ANOMALOUS SALE OF THE OLD ILOILO AIRPORT IN 2007." This is the best joke we've heard all week.
7. INFORMAL SETTLERS PANIC OVER NEWS OF MORE DEMOLITIONS. For emergencies, dial your Informal Homeowners' Association.
8. THE OPTICAL MEDIA BOARD (OMB) CONTINUES TO RAID PIRATED DVD HUBS. OMB head Ronnie Ricketts stands a better chance of reviving his career than shutting down the bootleg empire.
9. THE REAL-LIFE SOAP OPERA STARRING KRIS AQUINO AND JAMES YAP CONTINUES. Next week, James' long-lost twin will turn up and admit it was actually he who was married to Kris.
10. PRESIDENT NOYNOY AQUINO TAKES A HANDS-OFF STANCE ON HACIENDA LUISITA ISSUE. Hello, deja vu.



