1. 24TH ANNIVERSARY OF PEOPLE POWER REVOLT OBSERVED. You're supposed to look the best you'll ever look at 24. Too bad I can't say the same for our country.
2. KRIS AQUINO FALLS IN THE SHOWER, SUFFERS CONCUSSION. We wish Kris a speedy recovery devoid of unforeseen side effects…well, except maybe for a marked improvement in her acting.
3. VILLAR MOST TRUSTED PRESIDENTIABLE, 7 OUT OF 10 PINOYS DON'T TRUST GMA ACCORDING TO PULSE ASIA SURVEY. Mr. Villar, if you're not careful, the second half of this news item could happen to you in six years.
4. DOH SECRETARY CABRAL DEFENDS DISTRIBUTION OF CONDOMS TO STOP HIV/AIDS EPIDEMIC IN THE COUNTRY; CATHOLIC CHURCH CALLS FOR HER RESIGNATION. Take it from Tori Spelling: You can either build a fence around your swimming pool or you can teach your kids to swim. On second thought, maybe Tori won't make Secretary Cabral's arguments more credible.
5. INTERNATIONAL TENSION BREWS AS ARGENTINA PROTESTS OIL DRILLING OFF FALKLANDS BY UK. Sure, I get nostalgic for 1982 sometimes. But there are some things I wouldn't want them to bring back. Like the Falklands War. Or legwarmers.
6. TRAINER KILLED BY KILLER WHALE AT FLORIDA MARINE PARK. With humans, they do something terrible then they get thrown into prison. With wildlife, they get thrown into prison then they do something terrible.
7. PACQUIAO MANSION TO BE FEATURED IN MTV'S CRIBS. I can't wait for Manny to say that trademark line from Cribs: "You've seen my house, now get out!"
8. VILLAR AND NOYNOY STAGE COMPETING MUSIC CONCERTS, INSIST THE EVENTS ARE NOT POLITICAL. If they can't Cha-Cha, at least they can rock.
9. AUSTRALIAN FANS WALK OUT OF WHITNEY HOUSTON COMEBACK CONCERT. First Britney, now Whitney. Maybe Aussies are dissing divas whose names rhyme.
10. OLYMPIC BRONZE WINNER SNOWBOARDER SCOTTY LAGO FORCED TO LEAVE VANCOUVER AFTER RACY PICTURES SURFACE ONLINE. How do you improve ratings for the Winter Olympics? According to the IOC, it helps to kick out athletes who make the Olympics fun.