SPOT.ph blogger Lourd de Veyra drew equal parts glowing praise and violent disagreement when he compared Kris Aquino to a "car accident on SLEX-it’s horrible but you can’t look away." A Palanca awardee and Radioactive Sago Project’s vocalist, he has published two books of poetry, Subterranean Thought Parade and Shadowboxing in Headphones. He also hosts the thought-provoking "Word of the Lourd," a segment on TV5’s TEN: The Evening News.
SPOT.ph caught up with Lourd de Veyra for an exclusive interview about cockroaches, stalkers and alcoholics.
You have a lot of fans.
Ewan ko. ’Di ko naman sila nakikita. Wala namang fans ang Sago. Naalala ko mga nakukuha namin, mga nerdy little boys. Ayoko ’yun. Wala akong mapapala sa kanila. Chicks. Gusto ko chicks.
You were never stalked?
Alam ko magandang lalake ako pero... ang mga stino-stalk, mga Bamboo, Rico Blanco. Calling all stalkers. Basta mga chicks lang.
What would you say to Kris Aquino if you bumped into her one day?
How’s the head, ate?
Given the chance to slap one of our politicians senseless, who would you whack?
Raul F*cking Gonzalez.
Did you really pee on Gloria Arroyo’s image on a bas-relief in your TV segment, "Word of the Lourd"?
Hindi naman tumama sa mukha ’yun eh, sa ilalim lang.
Have you picked a presidential candidate?
My heart belongs to Jamby (Madrigal).
Even though she said all those things about Judy Ann Santos?
Hindi lang ’yun. May pinaiyak siyang military officer kung saan nakakulong ’yung Morong 43. Ayaw siyang papasukin. Sabi niya, "Sh*t ka, babae ka pa naman."
Would you write a column in Filipino?
Puwede, wala namang nag-o-offer eh. [Tungkol sa] lenggwahe at seryosong panitikan. ’Tsaka food.
What do you do when you get writer’s block?
I think of the cheques that would be potentially lost forever.
Are you planning on releasing another book?
This year sana ’yung third collection of poetry ’tsaka maglalabas ako ng nobela. ’Yung nobela, last year pa dapat eh. Maarte lang ako, nag-revise ako. Hanggang ngayon, nag-re-revise pa rin. Maarte ako eh.
If you could have a conversation with any fictional character, who would it be and why?
Siguro si Gregor Samsa sa The Metamorphosis. It’s not every day that you get to talk to a cockroach.
Do you think alcoholics make better writers?
No, hindi totoo ’yan. Kalokohan ’yan. Sobriety is king. Alak pa (raises a glass of red wine). Cheers to that.
Which album in your collection are you most embarrassed to own?
Bon Jovi’s Crush. I have no idea how it got there.
What is the worst song you’ve ever heard?
"Fixing a Broken Heart" by Indecent Obsession.
What do you like to sing in the shower?
"Singing in the Rain."
Do you dance?
Minsan. ’Yung mga straight techno, straight house with enormous amounts of alcohol. Depende sa DJ. In fact, balak kong mag-aral ng ballroom dancing next year. Tango to be more specific. Kasi tumatanda na ako, parang ’di na bagay ’yung may mga glow sticks. Gusto kong tumanda ’yung naka-tuxedo, naka-pomada, may rosas sa ipin. Tapos may dini-dip na chicks.
What’s your comfort food?
Would you believe tokwa? Pritong tokwa na may toyo, konting sibuyas at asukal.
What food don’t you like?
Ayoko ng chocolate. ’Pag nilagay mo ako sa desert island, tapos may isang bandehada ng tsokolate diyan at buhay na baka, kakagatin ko ’yung baka habang buhay pa. Kakain ako ng sapatos kaysa kumain ng icing, lalo na ’yung icing sa wedding cake. Hate na hate ko talaga ’yun. Tapos pipilitin ako ng bride and groom, "Kain ka!" Sapakin kaya kita. Ang tunay na lalaki hindi kumakain ng cake.
What were you like in high school?
Responsableng estudyante ako nung high school. Councilor pa ako sa student council namin. Palagi akong late noon, ang layo ng eskwelahan (Colegio de San Juan de Letran) namin eh. Atleta pala ako. Varsity ako ng table tennis. Champion kami sa NCCA (National Collegiate Athletic Association) for four years. Minsan na lang [akong mag-table tennis ngayon].
What was your worst subject in school?
Math except for physics.
Lourd de Veyra and his brother and Radioactive Sago Project bassist, Francis, win
Producer of the Year at the NU Rock Awards 2007.
If you were to live your life stuck in a particular decade, which one would it be and why?
Fifties siguro. In terms of aesthetics, parang ang ganda ng mga linya, ang simple-simple. Napaka-functional ng mga bagay. That was the time when people wore hats. Katatapos lang ng giyera so parang may dinadala silang mentality na kung hindi extreme enjoyment, it’s caution. So parang balanse ’yung lipunan. Alam mong may pinanggalingan kang traumatic, at the same time kailangan mong paligayahin ’yung sarili mo because you just went through a bad experience. ’Tsaka ang ganda ng mga amerikana, mga suits. Mad Men, parang ganoon.
What’s the best hangover cure you’ve tried?
Kung may trabaho on that day, Biogesic at Cobra Energy Drink. Kung wala, Biogesic at Valium, para tulog buong araw.
Do you have any social networking accounts?
Friendster lang. Pero dati pa ’yun. Nakalimutan ko na mga passwords and sh*t. Wala akong Facebook. Prepaid lang ang Smart Bro ko eh. So far, hindi pa naman ako namamatay dahil wala akong Facebook.
What is the prescription of your eyeglasses?
1,200 at 1,500. Legally blind na’ko. Under the law, I’m not supposed to drive. Isipin mo, nag-start akong magsalamin, grade 2. 600 na ’yung grado ko kaagad. Congenital. Nag-try akong [mag-contacts]. Tumutugtog kami noon, tatanggalin mo, tatalsik. Kakapain mo sa floor. Leche, bahala ka sa buhay mo. Mga one month lang, kinalimutan ko na.
What’s your reaction when people call you "astig"?
Ewan. Si Robin Padilla lang dapat ’yun.
Ano ang tunay na lalake?
Still the same: May tae sa brief.
If you were forced to take a 9-to-5, white-collar job for the rest of your life, what would you pick?
Lisa Gokongwei-Cheng’s (Summit Media president) job. Anytime.
If you go to rest today, what legacy would you like to leave behind?
He was more than just a pretty face (laughs).
Photo (homepage) by Jun Pinzon.