10 Addictively Bad Love Songs
From Meatloaf to Jessa Zaragoza, SPOT.ph lists 10 cheesy but catchy love songs your ears are likely to be subjected to this love month.
As we enter the week of romance, we can't help but feel a little bit smitten (or bitter), wallowing in the stomach-churning melodies of sappy ballads. Like lovesick puppies, we tend to lose ourselves to the emotional rush they give us as we tune in and listen or, God forbid, sing along.
SPOT.ph lists down 10 of the most addictively bad love songs that will probably always have a place in every KTV machine in the country:
"As Long As You Love Me" by the Backstreet Boys
Why it's addictive: It's an old-school Backstreet Boys track, of course it's addictive. It makes singing "Quit Playing Games" and "I Want It That Way" with matching boyband choreography look completely normal.
Why it's bad: While listening to the song, you're forced to ask whether the boys have zero standards in choosing their flames, or if they really just don't care if their lovers end up being deranged serial killers or bald, middle-aged men.
Our favorite line: "I don't care who you are, where you're from, what you did, as long as you love me."
"Total Eclipse of the Heart" by Bonnie Tyler
Why it's addictive: It grabs you in a hypnotic, phantom-like way. That's probably because of how the words "turn around" supersede every other lyric of the song; we might as well change the title to "Turn Around Bright Eyes."
Why it's bad: Aside from its "superb" lyrics, we should also mention that the video is equally hilarious, especially if you watch the literal version.
Our favorite lines: "I don't know what to do and I'm always in the dark. We're living in a powder keg and giving off sparks."
"I'll Make Love To You" by Boyz II Men
Why it's addictive: The harmonic blending of the guys' voices on top of an old-school background track, minus the unnecessary vocal gymnastics, actually makes it a really good RnB song.
Why it's bad: The second stanza is practically aural pornography. If you listen carefully, you'll get a clear blow by blow. It's so sexual it will make you want to clean your ears right after listening to it on repeat.
Our favorite lines: "Girl, are you ready? It's gonna be a long night."
"My Heart Will Go On" by Celine Dion
Why it's addictive: It's the Titanic theme song, duh.
Why it's bad: Let's face it, every time Ms. Dion belts out the lyrics, people almost always remember Rose and Jack as they fought against their social status and braved the frozen sea all for the "glory of love." But honestly, just like that sappy disaster flick, the song is overplayed and overrated.
Our favorite lines: "Near, far, wherever you are, I believe that the heart does go on."
"The Day You Said Goodnight" by Hale
Why it's addictive: Champ Lui Pio's nasal voice trying to reach those emotive high notes is like listening to angels sing–the fallen kind.
Why it's bad: This track is proof that giddy emo girls will come to love a song if it's heavily seasoned with deep metaphors and ironies to the point where it's downright senseless. We're still scratching our heads, trying to decipher the chorus.
Our favorite line: "To be is all I've got to be, and all that I see, and all that I need this time."
"Bakit Pa'" by Jessa Zaragoza
Why it's addictive: Jessa Zaragoza's iconic singing voice, often mimicked by KTV addicts nationwide, subtly compels you to listen to this sappy track from beginning to end.
Why it's bad: From the moment we heard the canned percussions meld with the gloomy piano playing, we instantly knew that this song was destined to be a karaoke staple that truly deserves its place in the annals of cheesy OPM tunes.
Our favorite line: "Bakit ka pa nakita? Bakit pa nakilala kung ang puso ko ay iiwan mo lang at sasaktan?"
"I Would Do Anything for Love" by Meat Loaf
Why it's addictive: Its flawless transitions from a dreary ballad to a chaotic mess, reminiscent of Meat Loaf's Rocky Horror days, give it an odd catchy quality.
Why it's bad: It's a painfully long lyrical rollercoaster (12 minutes on mp3) sung by a man who swears that he would do anything for love, but he won't do... well, we're not sure what exactly, but he did keep repeating it the whole duration of the song.
Our favorite line: "I would do anything for love, but I won't do that."
"Always" by Erasure
Why it's addictive: If its repeated airplay in the early '90s didn't get you hooked, it was probably the Universal Motion Dancer's (UMD) smooth moves that made you a fan.
Why it's bad: Do we really need to explain why? Just dance. We bet you still know the steps. But if you're one of those poor souls who don't know how to do it, watch and learn.
Our favorite lines: "Always, I wanna be with you and make believe with you and live in harmony, harmony. Oh love."
"Beautiful Girl" by Jose Mari Chan
Why it's addictive: This breathy ode to a beautiful girl caught the fancy of so many artists, it's prompted several covers from the '80s to this day.
Why it's bad: Just like a gentle lullaby, its dreamy melody, reminiscent of Jose Mari Chan's other notable '80s commercial jingles, puts you right to sleep in the backseat of a slow-moving taxi.
Our favorite line: "Beautiful girl, wherever you are, I knew when I saw you, you had opened the door."
"Truly, Madly, Deeply" by Savage Garden
Why it's addictive: Darren Hayes' lazy voice and monotonous diction is dreamy. When you place that on top of a '90s pop track, you have yourself an instant hit.
Why it's bad: We don't even know where to begin. There's just too much cheese in it to feed the whole world. Just press play and "bathe" in its nostalgic mush.
Our favorite lines: "I want to stand with you on a mountain. I want to bathe with you in the sea. I want to lay like this forever, until the sky falls down over me."
SPOT.ph wants to know: What are your picks for the most addictively bad love songs of all time?