THE HIT LEAST #22: Your Cheat Sheet to the Hit Headlines

A roundup of the past week's lowlights in news and pop culture

1. BOARD OF MARINE INQUIRY INVESTIGATES POSSIBILITY THAT OPEN DOOR MAY HAVE SUNK SUPER FERRY 9. What's true of home safety is also true of sailing: Check to see if all the doors are closed!

2.       MAR AND NOYNOY TEAM UP, PROMISE NOT TO STEAL. It's a bit sad when this is the best we can expect of our politicians. Isn't this like hiring a job interviewee because he promised to show up?

3.       HOUSE PANEL RECALLS PROPOSED TAX ON TEXT MESSAGES. Never underestimate the power of democracy...or nuisance "Pass this on or else" text messages.

4.       LIBYAN LEADER MOAMMAR GADHAFI DELIVERS SPEECH AT U.N. GENERAL ASSEMBLY CALLING OBAMA HIS "SON" AND URGING ANOTHER INVESTIGATION INTO JFK'S ASSASSINATION. That trippy cap and house robe ensemble should have alerted U.N. authorities that he would do a Kanye.

5.       HUMAN RIGHTS COMMISSION AND TELECOMMUNICATIONS AGENCY AGAINST RADIO FREQUENCY ID FOR VEHICLES; TRANSPORT GROUPS SUPPORT IT. If those radio frequency ID's got you fined every time your bus honked its horn, would all those transport groups still support it?