Marian Rivera in aborted catfight, Rep. Pacman training hard + more lowlights

Marian Rivera experiences tension with co-star Bella Padilla, Pacman’s at it again, and more lowlights.

 

1. DESPITE THE CLAMOR FOR HER TO LEAVE, OMBUDSMAN MERCEDITAS GUTIERREZ--WHO WAS APPOINTED BY FORMER PRESIDENT GLORIA MACAPAGAL-ARROYO--SAYS SHE HAS NO PLANS OF RESIGNING. Delicadeza is not their middle name.

 

2. VIOLATORS OF ANTI-LITTERING LAW GIVE 1,001 EXCUSES TO THE MMDA. Despite their below-average IQ, idiots can pluck alibis out of thin air. (Unfortunately, the alibis are idiotic, too.)

 

3. JUETENG WHISTLEBLOWER SANDRA CAM CRIES OVER LACK OF GOVERNMENT SUPPORT. Why cry over spilled milk?

 

4. MORE ABANDONED BABIES FOUND. So now we’re a nation of hostage-takers and irresponsible baby-makers.

 

5. AFTER NEWS OF THEIR ALLEGED BREWING CATFIGHT MADE THE ROUNDS, MARIAN RIVERA AND ENDLESS LOVE CO-STAR BELLA PADILLA END THEIR RIFT. Why do showbiz squabbles never get to the good parts?

6. FORMER ABS-CBN STAR EDU MANZANO SAYS HE’S NOW HAPPY TO BE WITH GMA-7. What else can you say when you have no other choice?

 

7. SARANGANI CONGRESSMAN AND BOXER MANNY PACQUIAO NOW IN TRAINING FOR HIS SMACKDOWN WITH MEXICAN ANTONIO MARGARITO. How exactly is a boxer who’s fighting for money serving his country? (He puts on a good show but he ain’t exactly Jose Rizal.)

 

8. RETIRED LINGAYEN-DAGUPAN ARCHBISHOP OSCAR CRUZ SAYS GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS ARE INTO JUETENG, BUT REFUSES TO NAME NAMES. Thanks, dude, you just gave us the "mental blue balls."

 

9. PHILIPPINE NATIONAL POLICE DECLARES ALL-OUT WAR AGAINST JUETENG. Strangely enough, jueteng never gets killed in any of these all-out wars.

 

10. PINOYS BEGIN SHOPPING FOR CHRISTMAS DECOR AT THE DAPITAN ARCADE. Filipino time: Late for everything else, but always at least two months early for Christmas.

 

Art by Warren Espejo.

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