When Onions Are Expensive Like Steak, Can You Feel "Blessed" at Work?

(SPOT.ph) Internet celebrity Donnalyn Bartolome urged her 16 million Facebook followers who are down with return-to-work blues during the first week of 2023 to feel "blessed" instead, triggering those who have languished in their current jobs as the cost of living skyrockets.

The 28-year-old vlogger and Kakaibabe hitmaker said she could have phrased her New Year's Day message "better" and that it was not applicable to everyone. Still, her remarks at the start of the year where onions have become as expensive as steak stirred debates on when positivity at work becomes toxic.

Also read:
Toxic Positivity: Why It's Important to Live With Negative Emotions
How to Avoid Toxic Positivity and Be Happy Without Trying Hard

"Bakit may sad dahil back to work na? Diba dapat masaya ka kasi may chance ka na pagandahin buhay mo at ng pamilya? Trip ko pa nga may work ng January 1 dahil superstition ko may work ako buong taon pag ganun. Dapat grateful kasi may work," reads part of her viral post, which she has since deleted.

"This post could have been phrased better, I agree. It failed to fully phrase the message I wanted to convey. If gusto mo i-apply, up to you. Kung hindi applicable sa’yo 'yung post then hindi," said Bartolome in a separate post.

Filipinos are among the most stressed out employees in Southeast Asia in 2021 according to Gallup, so it's no surprise that bone-tired workers resented Bartolome's post. Her work experience as a social media personality differs from others, and while these lived experiences are valid, empathy is a must from both sides, said life coach Myke Celis. 

"She's looking at it based on her own set of experiences; the people who reacted are doing the same... The main issue here is how we can practice respect and empathy both ways and when and how to respond instead of merely reacting, only if needed," he told SPOT.ph.

Donnalyn Bartolome says work is a matter of 'mindset'

For corporate slaves dreading Mondays, feeling cheerful isn't about "mindset-mindset lang." The mental preparations for another work week eat up Sunday rest day, which include the stress of having to wake up before sunrise for two to three hours of commute to the office. 

Work weeks start and end with the anxiety of facing long lines at the MRT, jeepney terminals, or EDSA Carousel partly due to insufficient rides for the commuting public. For those who can afford cabs, Grab, Angkas or even habal, it means paying higher fare for relatively faster commute if there's a rider willing to bring them to their destination. Employees who bike to work fight for their space on the highways on the road while beating traffic on two wheels and helmets. 

No thanks to lengthy commutes, stress demotivates employees and affects work engagement. How would you inspire employees to face a whole day of meetings and powerpoint decks if first thing in the morning, the train bogged down or the bus got stuck in an EDSA gridlock? An employee spends an average of 39.3 hours a week at work, according to PSA's November 2022 data. That's 85 days of an employee's life spent at work per year, not to mention the commute, OTys (overtime thank you's) and emergency meetings.

Also read: Commuting to Work Feels Like Unpaid Labor, Should Employers Pay You For It?

While we can argue that it's a blessing to have a job in this economy when prices of onions skyrocket to P700 per kilo or almost 1.5 the daily minimum wage, invalidating other people's struggles to encourage gratitude is a toxic positivity that we don't need this year. Not everyone is lucky enough to work in a job they're passionate about, and even so, they could be dealing with toxic office drama and fending off job burnout as MS Teams, Viber, Telegram work notifications flooded phones during the holidays.

Can you imagine how some 7.16 million underemployed Filipinos spent their holidays as they juggled multiple jobs or clock in more hours just to make ends meet? Coming off from the holidays doesn't mean all employees were well-rested. Some, like frontliners or those in the service industry, had to work while others were preparing their Noche Buena or welcoming the new year with fireworks.

"Toxic positivity blurs the real emotions underneath of a person going through really tough times. That leads the person to neglect his/her own feelings and mask them instead so as to avoid feeling guilty or ashamed for not being okay," said Celis.

"While having hope during drastic situations, it is also imperative to acknowledge negative emotions from unfortunate situations to be able to learn and grow from them and not just set them aside as if they don't matter at all because they do."

It's okay to start the year slow

Dear employees, don't feel pressured to start the year with a bang. First, you don't have to share the work mindset of Bartolome, who believes that hustling every January 1 sets the tone for the entire year career-wise. Second, post-holiday blues do happen, and it's normal after a prolonged break from routine. 

"Going back to a routine is not easy and it takes time to adjust accordingly thus, resistance may initially be there. It doesn’t mean that people don’t like what they do; it only means they are slowly easing themselves into their work," said Celis.

To be clear, there's nothing wrong with celebrating yourself and your growth as long as it isn't tone-deaf, said Celis.

"Ask yourself: how would I feel if I was in their position? What must I consider? How can I express myself respectfully without holding back my real intentions?"

"Success shaming is one culture that us Filipinos must learn to overcome eventually so as to be genuinely happy for each other's growth. At the end of the day, remember that posting on social media isn't the only way to celebrate your luck -- you have a beautiful life outside it with friends and loved ones who will genuinely celebrate you and your wins, in real time, non-virtually."

Myke Celis is a life coach, author, and motivational speaker. Visit this website for his services.