10 Funny Quotes From Pinoy Politicians

From lighthearted jests to ridiculous statements

 

(SPOT.ph) It wouldn't be too farfetched to say that politics is messier than the aftermath of Laboracay. In the Philippines, it can be as comedic as it can be absurd. Our public servants are not limited to legislators; there are film stars, athletes, and even former convicts (just stating facts here). Like P-Noy's "E 'di wow" remark, here are 10 statements by Filipino politicians that will leave you chuckling.

 

Also read: 10 Crazy Political "Souvenirs"

 

 

Kapag tumataas ang posisyon mo sa gobyerno, lumiliit ang balls mo.– Sen. Miriam Defensor-Santiago’s conclusion after noticing that government novices play basketball, mid-level employees play bowling, and those in the upper seats play golf.
So does the President squash ballsor rather—play squash?

 

 

Pagka nagkaintindihan tayo, ikaw 'yong…patay ka. – Davao City Mayor Rodrigo Duterto to Vice Ganda when asked if all three of his girlfriends are female.
The mayor admitted that he has a wife and three other girlfriends who are all unaware of each other...until the show's telecast. 

 

 

 

Hindi ko talaga alam iyang House Bill na ‘yan. Pero, ok ‘yan.” – Vice President Jejomar Binay’s answer to a student who asked about House Bill 252 at a Q&A at the University of the Philippines Los Baños (UPLB).
More power to you, sir! 

 

 

Napapatunayan kong mahal mo ako tuwing sinasabi mong gwapo ako, kasi ‘yong nagmamahal lang talaga sa akin ang makakapagsabi ng gan’un.  – Sen. Chiz Escudero to Heart Evangelista on their Balesin wedding.
Acceptance is key. 

 

 

 

We need to create a Department of Common Sense.”Manuel "Mar" Roxas II on hindrances in doing business in the Philippines and bureaucratic rules that are no longer relevant.
Alternate translation: We have to pay taxes for common sense.

 

Sabi naman n’ya, ‘This is love at first sight,’ sabi ko, ‘Kalokohan ’yan. Walang nagla-love at first sight.’”  Imelda Marcos on being proposed to by former president Ferdinand Marcos, 20 minutes after they met.
That may be true, but they got married 11 days after. 

 

 

 

Sinabi ng Senadora na ako ay may asim pa. Nagpapasalamat ako sa kanyang sinabi, pero ikinalulungkot kong sabihin hindi ako naasiman sa kanya.” – Sen. Juan Ponce Enrile on Sen. Miriam Defensor Santiago’s statement, “May asim pa si Tanda.
We don't think she was referring to your "appeal," sir. But whatever floats your boat...

 

 

I will not be absent because the whole country will be my responsibility.” – Sarangani Rep. Manny Pacquiao on running for senator.
...says someone who’s always present during chamber sessions. Because apparently, being a congressman doesn't require his presence much.

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Turo po ng tatay ko sa'kin, e pag nagbitaw ka ng salita, mahirap o madali, kailangan mangyari ito...At pag hindi po nangyari ito, nandyan po si Sec. Abaya, mangangasiwa ng proyektong ‘to. Dalawa na kaming magpapasagasa siguro sa tren. – President Benigno Aquino III in 2013, on the consequence he was willing to take if the LRT (Light Rail Transit) Line 1 project from Baclaran to Bacoor will not be completed by 2015.
Two months to go! 

 

 

Basta ang masasabi ko, bata pa ako. Babangon si Bong Revilla. Hintayin natin sa tamang panahon.” – Sen. Bong Revilla after saying that he firmly believes his detractors know he wants to run for president and conspired to put him in jail.
But Tamang Panahon already happened, right? 

 

 

Also read: 10 Crazy Political "Souvenirs"

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